Last post I talked about how going to work allowed me a chance to see the guests being happy and vicariously living through it, etc. But today at work reality hit me with a sledgehammer. I try to talk to the guests when ever I get a chance and this kid, maybe 12 years old, walks up to my game by himself and he's just checking out my game. I don't really make a big deal about it because a lot of kids just like to look at the different games. So I ask him, "How's it going?" And he says "Okay." And I go through the motions of asking him about the game, if he wants to play, does he have money, etc. He's still wavering so I figure he doesn't really want to play and I just let it go. He continues to stand around so I ask him "Where's your family?" And he says something like, "Nowhere." And I think to myself, "Silly children, can't answer questions," So I ask him "How'd you get to Disneyland then?" And then he said "Foster parents." I was just stunned.

Obviously I knew of the existence of orphan children but for some reason I just got really bummed out hearing it from him. The kid seemed like a nice enough boy. I wanted to say something like "I'm sorry" or anything, but I couldn't think of anything appropriate to say. Anyways, he played the game and won, and I'm glad he was able to get a prize, however small that may be.

I saw Jersey Girl and it was really good. Not like the other Kevin Smith movies. There was no mention of pot, no Bluntman and Chronic, no Star Wars references... well okay, there was ONE, but it was a good one and you probably wouldn't even notice it. Its just a good story about growing up and certainly different from the other "Jersey Trilogy" movies. And as sad as it is to say, it made me want to have kids.

Spring break was mostly a bust for me, as I did a lot of nothing. I had been anticipating seeing somebody, but things never work out the way they do in my head. I always have these really awesome plans in the middle of the night, just before I goto sleep. I come up with these elaborate ideas of how I'm going to go about doing something and it seems so perfect when I'm tired. I guess its true that "Nothing is as perfect as you can imagine it." Anyways, I got to see the person, but it left me more bummed out than elated, unfortunately. Then there was the whole foster parents thing. I'm such a lucky person, I hardly deserve any of this.

Ataris - Looking Back on Today (Acoustic)

A few days ago I had this dream in which I won a radio contest. It was like one of those dealios where you call in and you're caller number whatever. Anyways, it turns out I was invited to the studio to meet Hoobastank. In real life, I don't particularly like this band or anything, but they've got some catchy tunes. Back in the dream, it was a few days later and I was in the studio of the radio station with some other winners of the same contest. We had finished talking to the band and they'd left and I was talking to some of the people who were there and there was this really hot girl that I was talking to. She and I kept saying "I want to goto so and so concert!" And the other person would be like "Me too!" And then I'd say something like "Well, I don't like this song very much." And she'd say "I hate that song!" And it was like we were exactly the same, except she was really hot. That was a pretty cool dream but then I had to goto class, in real life, and that wasn't as cool.

Today I missed my class because I overslept. I heard my alarm and basically ignored it. This quarter, despite taking only three classes, I'm doing worse than ever. I found out that I had finished nearly all of my requirements for graduation except for two history classes and my foreign language requirement but I'm still short the required number of units to graduate and basically I'd be just filling it in with any classes I want to take, just to fulfill the unit requirements.

A few weeks back I watched L'Auberge Espnaol. Its a movie about a French student who goes to Spain to study abroad for a year. Anyways, long story short, it made me really want to study abroad. I mean I've been thinking about it since Freshman year, and probably before, but I got motivated because of it and I seriously looked into it. Unfortunately, my dreams may have been shattered by what my counselor told me about graduating and fulfilling my language requirement. I slacked off on taking a foreign language and with the technicalities of it all, I screwed myself over and now the likelihood of me going abroad fade quickly. But I so want to break out of the norm and just experience new things.

As far as breaking out of the norm, I think thats why I still work at Disneyland. I have to drive home every weekend but I love it because it gives me a chance to see people be happy, especially the guests. Its a cheap thrill, to be sure, but I like what it represents. I think its a combination of my own ability to sort of block everything else out while I'm working and also vicariously share in other peoples' fun.

I suppose I ought to end on something positive. I haven't lost any weight since the New Year in spite of my resolution to work out more. I've continued my jogging and some weight lifting (although not exactly an expert at that) and I've exercised at least 4 days a week, every week. If anything, I've gained weight. You'd think that'd bother me? But no! I feel a lot healthier! I'm sure the calculable results will appear soon, both on the scale and in the weight room.

Joss Stone - Fell In Love With a Boy

On Tuesday I was watching the Food Network and I saw this lady making these really awesome looking meatballs. She made these gigantic meatballs the size of a baseball, and it had onions and parsley and all this awesome stuff in it and it made me really want to eat Spaghetti. Just a simple spaghetti with marinara sauce and maybe 3 or 4 giant meatballs. Man, that makes me hungry just thinking about it.

Almost everyday when I goto class I take my ipod to class and I love it. But I attribute my lack of meaningful updates on this blog to that. Listening to my music zones me out from the rest of the world. For example, today, on the bus the driver and some other student were talking about something that I wasn't paying attention to. Then all of a sudden two other passengers laughed together with the driver and the first person. I missed out on whatever it is was said. I know that it probably was inconsequential and just a stupid joke but maybe it was a really funny joke! Listening to music (or whatever) when in public like that isolates people. I know that seemed like a rather obvious statement, but I had to slowly realize this myself. I'm still trying to decide whether I like having a soundtrack to my strolling or if I prefer to pay attention to my surroundings.

Earlier this week, I went jogging in the rain. It was cold as hell. Well, actually when I was beginning to jog it wasn't too bad. but when I turned around, I realized that it wasn't so bad to start with because I was running with the wind/rain. Running into the rain, not cool. Definately not as cool as it looks in the movies.

Incubus - Talk Show on Mute I bought the new Incubus CD, a crow left of the murder. Its sort of disappointing, especially considering the sweetness of Morning View. But its got a few redeeming tracks.

I really like Peanut Butter M&M's. I bought a bag today inbetween classes and put it in my backpack. Then not twenty minutes ago (around 3:00AM) I realized I hadn't eaten them yet. And I pulled them out and ate them, and it was tasty.

Rage Against the Machine - Killing in the Name Of

2004. Thats really weird.

I remember I had this pretty awesome T-Shirt in elementary school. It was red with black graphics/lettering. I don't know who gave it to me, but it had this pretty cool image with some kid driving a spaceship and it said "Class of 2001." I couldn't even comprehend graduating, much less the year 2001.

In 1996, during the Olympics in Atlanta, I was so into the whole Olympic thing that my cousin and I planned to save up as much money as we could to goto the Sydney games in 2000 and I could hardly wait for 2000.

Now its 2004. How awesome.

For New Year's, I've resolved to do at least one thing, get in shape. Anything else that improves will be secondary. If I can get in shape, I'll be happy. And I've gotten off to a good start already, jogging every day so far! Yay for me!

Jason Mraz - I'll Do Anything