Well, Thanksgiving break has started and I haven't posted for nearly two weeks, good for me eh? Ah well. Not much to post really... I guess I found my life much more interesting back in high school. Or maybe its more like I've just got more stuff to do in college.... nahhh.... I don't do anything but play computer games, eat, occassionally study, and talk to other people even more infrequently... or somem other schedule that sounds less loser-like. But now that I'm back home I guess I've got more "alone" time. No, nothing like masturbating or anything stupid like that... you perverts. Anyways.

For Thanksgiving, I did basically the same thing I do every year. Got together with my family and ate a Chinese mixed with American food Thanksgiving feast. It's weird really, but I guess you'd have to be in my family to understand it, or possibly just be Chinese. So at any rate, it was pretty good dinner. We had a Thanksgiving dinner at my dorm dining hall and that actually tasted better, the stuffing and turkey part anyways. Here at home, my Chinese-ized turkey and stuffing wasn't quite what I'd expect from a Thanksgiving dinner. But the Chinese food was certainly welcome, dorm food sucks for the most part.

Well today I was at the mall and I was there to observe the shopping goings-on since it is supposed to be the busiest shopping day of the year, but here in Cerritos at least, it was quite lax. I mean there were quite a few people in the mall, but it wasn't booming with people which certainly isn't a good sign. But anyways, thats not what this is about. Stupid sidetracking. Two odd things happened to me. First of all, I was at Kelly's Coffee at the Cerritos mall and I saw this girl working at the counter who I'd never seen working there before. I go to Kelly's quite a bit, nearly everytime I'm at the mall in fact. Its one of those small Starbuck's like stores, but so much better, coffee and price wise anyways. Its got those wooden floors and coffee beans all over the walls with artsy-fartsy pictures and wooden chairs and tables, you know the type. At any rate, the person working at the counter was strangely familiar and I suddenly realized that it was because I had went to Middle School, or Junior High, whatever you want to call it, with her! Admitedly, she was one of those "cool" people, as far as the social ladder went, and I was just a sociable drifter type who made friends with most people. Its like this one TIME magazine article described about high school. I'm one of those kids who made friends and talked on the phone with all the cool people, but didn't get invited to the parties. Something of that sort.

Well, this girl looked exactly the same, except maybe taller, since middle school, and I can remember having a ... crush on her. Mostly because she paid me attention, and was fairly cute at the time, and now too. But I didn't say a thing to her, well other than my order. I don't even know why. Its not like it would've done anything, but my excuse was that she was busy, and there was a long line... I don't know. So I left that store with only my mocha freeze, which is better than the stupid Frappuchinos from Starbucks by the way.

Okay, so the night continued fairly normally until I got to Sam Goody. On display there was the newest of the new video game consoles, Nintendo's very own Gamecube. There was a demo available to play there and the girl playing there offered me the second controller so I could join her in playing WaveRace. Now this is completely normal right? Two nice people, strangers, just sharing somethign that is free to everybody. But she soon left me to play alone, and I never got a look at her face, or body ;) for that matter but I did talk with her a bit while staring at the TV screen. And what got me after she left went something like "What if she's the girl of my dreams?" I know it sounds really cliche'd and stuff, but what if she was it and I missed my chance right there. Or what if the girl at Kelly's, my old middle school friend was it? However unlikely, what if, huh?

So what this has taught me is that I should stop being such a chicken, introduce myself to people... and Carpe Diem and all that stuff, like Robin Williams says in Dead Poet's Society, applied to a hopeless romantic situation! Please tell me if I'm making no sense what so ever.

Underdog Project - Summer Jam

I came into college believing that I was one step or more ahead of the game, when I'm really on the same step. Its pretty bad. Whenever I try to applaud myself and think that I'm ahead of the game, I'm not. But its okay, at least I get an idea of reality, or rather, my reality anyways. But I've got a long day ahead of me. And I still haven't slept, I spent all night wasting time, and taking 3 hours to do a 20-30 minute assignment. Sigh. Oh well, the troubled life of a college student eh?

The Little Mermaid - Part of Your World

I'm just too damn picky. College is supposed to help you make new friends and all that stuff, and while I've made new friends and that "stuff" I've also found that I'm becoming more and more selective. I keep looking for a girlfriend. Well not really, but a life partner of sorts, or whatever you'd want to call it and I can't seem to find anybody who I can imagine myself with in the future. I don't know if its because I'm afraid of different things, I know that I'm afraid of change, but I'm not sure if its the difference in reality and my dreams that I'm afraid of, or if its something else. And as with everything, its probably a combination of everything. A combination of my fear of change, failure, and general bad luck. Heh.

I've also recently found that I should avoid staying in the same place for very long with people, and in life. After a while, I get stuck in a rut. I'm not one of those people who starts strong and finishes strong, or stronger. I just start strong and I fade from there. Maybe thats a bad sign for me and a bad omen for my future. Damnit, why can't I just be more darn positive. Blah.

I did pretty darned well on my mid-terms this first quarter of college. I mean I haven't really gotten the grades back yet or anything, but just coming out of the tests, I feel that I finished strong :) Or at least I'm strong half-way through, which is more than I can say for most of my efforts. But this Blogspot post has just disturbed me from my studying in the middle of the night, so I'll depart on that somewhat positive note. Wheeeeee.

Aaliyah - Rock the Boat